F is for . . . Fairy Land

There was a place I used to visit.

What a lovely place it was.

It would leave me feeling more relaxed than any massage, more rejuvenated than any facial and more energised than any caffeine.

It was a place I would visit often yet it was different each and every time.

A place I would look forward to, yet it was over in the blink of an eye.

It was a place I could go when I needed it most, it was always there, always available and always ready to take me into its warm safe arms.

It told me stories, it played me memories and it gave me everything I had ever wanted.

This place has been gone for a while now, I miss this place, I miss the comfort.

I know one day I'll return to this place, I'll feel its regularity, its closeness.

Ill feel safe, relaxed and rejuvenated once more.

Until then, i'll remember all the good times we once shared, and look forward to the time where I get to meet it once more.

Oh sleep, please come back to me!

D is for . . . Disaster

I was pretty excited about doing some afternoon cooking today. I had already made some muffins for Thomas to take to work and they are frozen and ready to go.

I also made some rolls which I put in the freezer, this is my most favorite idea, that my mum showed me. (I guess you could say its a family secret ;) ) It keeps the rolls as fresh as they were today, and I can make a whole load of them today, that will last the rest of the week.
Luckily we had roast chicken for lunch so there was plenty left over, which works wonderfully in bread rolls for the rest of the week!

Next on the agenda was Muesli bars!

They look good right?

Well wrong, which is why I havent posted the recipe.

It needs some, well some pretty major tweaks.

As they look good here, about point five of a second after this was taken, they fell to pieces and turned into a really delicious mess! So i will work out the weeds in this recipe and post it again next weekend.

And hope to have more luck.

Other than that this weekend has been less than eventful, I did some washing, I actually made it all the way through my washing pile, which pretty much never happens.

And then I had to wear my little man, as his teeth are still hurting him, so I wrapped him on, and managed to get the mopping and the vacuuming done, and even the dishes. while he fell asleep.

So I feel like I got a lot accomplished this weekend and had some great bonding time with my little family!

I hope that the rest of you had a great weekend, and all of you that are in the line of the BigWet are staying safe, im sending you all of my good thoughts.

Question of the day - What has been your most tasty food disaster?

L is for . . . The Little Things

People are quick to throw you all their advice. So often I heard, "ohh dont be holding your baby all the time, he will end up spoiled" I have to say, everytime I heard that I had to grit my teeth. He is my baby and I will hold him whenever I please.

And thats where I am right now, laying on the couch, watching the rain out the window, while I feel the soft gentle breathing of E on my chest. He looks so peaceful, his skin so soft against mine. I feel this amazing love for the little person I created.

I carried him around inside me for 9 months. I laboured for 3 days, I pushed for one hour and I have now fed him from myself, for three months. He is half of me, half of his amazing dad, and I know that a few extra hugs every now and then and some naps on my chest wont spoil him. Infact I hope they can remind him exactly how amazing he is and how much he means to me.

I love you little man, from the moment you started growing inside me and for the rest of your life.

J is for . . . Jinx

Of course after posting yesterday about my favorite time of the day being 10pm, tonight Ethan decides that it would be fun to cry from 10- 10:45. I dont even think he was sure why he was crying, but one second he jusy stopped, smiled at me and fell straight to sleep.

Its times like this I feel so overwhelmed. I know this is what comes with being a mum, endless crying and not knowing how to help your baby. But that doesnt make it any easier. I hate feeling helpless and I hate that I get so frustrated. I let that little voice creep into my head that says I'm not good enough, that im being a terrible mum. This voice tends to lead to me getting even more frustrated for thinking this way.

I know deep inside, even in moments like this that I'm a good mum. That im doing everything in my power to help him and make him feel comfortable. But its the crying and the way he looks me in the eyes, that makes me think I should be doing more to help him. I know i'm doing all I can, I just wish there was more I could do.

Well he is asleep now, and I think its also time for me to hit the hay. Fingers crossed he stays asleep for a while. I could use the zzzzzzzzz.

Goodnight!

Q is for . . .Quiet

Its 10pm, My other half is sleeping next to me and Ethan is quietly putting himself off to sleep on my other side. I love the little noises he makes, its almost as if he is singing his own little lullaby. It puts me off to sleep, thats for sure!

I love this time of day. There is no cooking or cleaning to be done, no screaming baby to settle, no talking, no noise...just silence. Beautiful, relaxing silence. I tend to just lay in bed and think about my day and daydream about life.

No matter how hard my day has been, 10pm is my wind down, the time I get to look forward too. Today was a bad day, its been long and tiring and sad to watch my little man, who is sick, just cry and cry and cry.

But its 10pm now and thats all forgotten. Instead I think about the smiles and the laughter and try and remember that tomorrow is a new day, the sun will rise on this new day and hopefully its a better one.

And of course, even if my day is just as bad, or even somewhat worse. I know that eventually it will be 10pm and it will all be ok.

That is of course until Thomas rolls over and gives me a wet willy...men!